Friday, August 25, 2006

Don't blame Canada

Considering that I'm not very political, I seem to be getting into more arguments than ever because of politics.

I was sitting and enjoying a nice pint of Guinness today at lunch with an associate, when I was rudely interrupted by a beligerant, ignorant war mongerer. Like I said, I'm not very political, although I do have my views and ordinarily would have left the moron to spout off, but then he had to go and drag Canadians inot the mix. That got me a little steamed, but I let it slide until he began to call us all good for nothing frenchmen. That put me over the edge. First off, I'm not fucking french, never have been and never will be, and I hate it when some dick assumes that we are all french. But that's a different rant.

There is actually a very small percent of the population that is french , and its ignorant fucks like this guy that leads the ill informed into confusion. His ranting had begun with his prediction of the next big attack on the united states and how the twin towers were going to look like cracking a peanut shell compared to the the next big attack. He then went on to discredit all liberals and democrats for their lazy mindset influence on the population and that was the reason we didn't have enough troops to blow all the "towel heads" up.

This made me pretty mad, but I was at a business lunch and didn't feel it my place to tell someone off for their opinion. Then he played the trump card and started to make fun of Canadians. That did it. I immediately turned to him and started giving him my piece of my mind about his ignorance, and that not all terrorist attacks have to come from the " fuckin towel heads" and that a couple of good 'ol american white boys proved that in Oklahoma back in the early 90's. I was good and fuming now and ripped him up and down about his background and the fact that his parents had immigrated here as did everybody's and that we have no right to blame anyone but our country's ignorance for this. If we hadn't stuck our nose in every other country's business we wouldn't have people pissed off at the USA all the time. Unfortunately the argument got personal and it really angered me that it turned out like that.

I have to admit that as good as it felt at the time, I was a little upset after because I had beaten him up pretty bad verbally in front of the whole bar, and exposed his true ignorance to everybody, and even though I did get a free beer from the bartender for it, I sit back now and wonder if this isn't how the whole damn thing got started in the first place?

Monday, August 21, 2006

Meatheads in the Booth

One of the most annoying things that's happened in my life is marrying a Boston Red Sox Fan. Now I'm not saying that she's annoying, its the baseball part that is. I was perfectly content to not watch and follow baseball, but I was pushed into it. I am heavy into sports, so of course I dove in head first. One of the pet peeves that I have about the less intense sports is the comentaters. I am a pretty big hockey fan, and usually during a hockey game, there isn't much time to dicuss who had what for dinner last wednesday. Baseball on the other hand is the complete opposite. It is the land of conversation, and in Boston, I have to admit, we are fairly lucky. Most of the games are televised on NESN(New England Sports Network), and the comentaters are Jerry Remmy and Don Orsillo. These guys crack me up. They are very good at calling the game and can make you laugh. That's all fine and dandy when NESN is broadcasting the games.Now here is where I start to get pissed off.

Every so often, Major League Baseball decides to let either FOX or ESPN televise a game. If it's Fox, we get to listen to Joe Buck and guest. If it's ESPN, we get Jon Miller and guest. Now I'm not too sure who's in charge of hiring for the comentaters postition, but he/she certainly deserves one hell of a kick upside the head. These guys are fuckin MORONS. I had the pleasure of listening to Jon Miller last night make about every wrong call he could, sound like a complete and utter idiot, and still be collecting a hefty paycheck. He couldn't talk, couldn't enunciate, and for all the experience he has, he sounded like a rookie jackass.

Joe Buck. Moron. M-O-R-O-N. Moron. There aren't too many words to describe this large foreheaded man, but I think this one suits him. I think that a prerequisite for these guys should be to go and actually play the game they are commentating on. I've never looked into it, but I have to assume that for all of the assinine comments that they make, there is no way that they have played the sport.

I know I might sound like an ass, but for the amount of money that goes into these sports, I'd like to think that the networks could produce a few guys to take a boring sport, and make it just a little more enjoyable for the masses. Instead we get fuckin Joe Buck and Jon Miller.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

America's premier funny man



Lewis Black. Quite possibly the funniest man alive. I've had the chance to see a few of his specials and this guy just cracks me up. Not being from this country, and still unable to vote, I've done my best to not get too wrapped up in all the political bullshit. That's not to say that I don't care, and that I don't have any opinions on the current government's decisions, but I have tried to steer clear. After watching Lewis Blacks HBO specials, and seeing him on John Stewarts Daily Show, I find it hard not to voice my opinion now.

My problems with politics have always been the same. I've had trouble connecting myself to a party. I'm definately not a republican, but sometimes the democrats make it hard to commit myself to them holeheartidly. I think that Lewis Black voices most of my opinions for me. I'm not a politcal genius, but if I could vote for president, Lewis would have mine.

Friday, August 18, 2006

Can you help?

I'm not sure if anybody knows who Mr. Rockharderections is, but if you do, could you pass me on the info? Apparently he knows me, or he wouldn't be sending me 4 to 10 emails a day. I mean I'm as friendly as the next person, but he seems a little pushy.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

The Smelly Car

Whenever I think that my head is just a little too full, or too many things are going on that I just can't stand to think for a while, I turn to my half hour savior, Seinfeld. I don't care how bad my head hurts, how shitty I feel, or how crappy the world can be, there is always and episode of seinfeld that can relieve the pain.

I was at a customer's house the other day, sizing up their heating system. That's what I do for work, hvac sales. So I'm standing there, taking measurements of the equipment, trying to figure out the best scenario and this kid comes down from upstairs to check out what's going on. He's probably 18 or 19, and seemed nice enough when I talked to him when I was upstairs with his parents, and he asks if there is anything that he can help with. I say sure, and give hime the end of the tape and he starts to help me with some long measurements. After a few measurements, I tell him I'm all set and thanks, but he stands right there. Doesn't move, just stands there. So I go about my business and start to walk past him and then it hits me. The stench. Now it's probably about 98 degrees outside with 200 friggin percent humidity so I've been sweating alot going into attics, so I quickly, take a wiff in my shirt to check it out. It's not me. I walk back in the other direction as if to check if I had left something behind me, and there it is again. I mean knock you on your ass, punch in the nose BO stench. Ripe onions stewed in the toilet couldn't be worse. And the damn kid keeps following me.

I finished my measurements, gave the lady a price and she takes the job. Two weeks go by, and we start the job. My sheet metal guy goes to the house the first day and freaks out. The kids is down there trying to help and my tin guy did the same thing I did and accepted, but now they are in a crawl space and he's gonna puke. He makes it through the day and heads home and calls me back saying that his girlfriend made him go back to his house to shower cause he smelled of BO so bad. The only thing I could think of doing was laughing and kicking on the episode of Seinfeld with the smelly valet that makes Jerry sell his car. the answer to the worlds problems...

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Baseball Umpires

I don't know what some of these umpires eat for breakfast, but they are way too enthusiastic considering they stand around in the same spot for 3-4 hours. I wonder if they aren't on the juice too? I mean it's crazy for some of them. Baseball isn't all that exciting for the most part, and maybe it's just their way of trying to make the time go by, but one of these guy's is gonna get a hernia soon.

I'm watching the Red Sox playing the Orioles, and things are rollin along, kinda the way a baseball game does and in like the middle of the 4th inning, the ump goes crazy calling a guy out at first. And it wasn't even that close!

I can understand at the end of game, score is real tight and there is a play at the plate or a real close call at one of the bags that would get you excited, but this is just right out of the blue!? And it meant jack! There were no base runners, it was the second out and this guy is calling it like its bases loaded, bottom of the ninth.

Some of the games I listen to the ump behind the plate calling strikes and I'm sure that people outside the park can hear him. He's just screaming striiiikkkkkkeeeee!!!
Is it that necessary? It's a tough job, and I sure as hell don't want it, not for any sport, and I'll do my best to not criticize them for their piss poor calls, just as long as they take it down a notch.

Two Monkeys

Not one, but two. I call them monkeys, because that's what the older of the two reminds me of. She is constantly climbing on the furniture, hanging off of things and getting into everything. I can only assume that the new edition will take after her older sister. In the morning, I think that she has gotten into the gin, cause she stumbles around like a drunken monkey, bumping into everything. They are cuter than monkey's though. The only thing I'm not sure of is who stinks more? Monkeys or my kids?

Monday, August 07, 2006

At Long Last

Charlotte Jane was born at 11:59pm on Sunday August 6th, just in time to get the same birthday as her second cousin Chloe, who was born in Madrid, Spain. Once again, the women in my family prove their stubborness with Charlotte leading the way being born face up. At a healthy 7 pounds 12 ounces, and 21" long, she is a beautiful little girl who's doiing extremely well.

Any of you who have not witnessed the miracle of child birth, you really have absolutely no idea what you are missing.

At Long Last

Charlotte Jane was born at 11:59pm on Sunday August 6th, just in time to get the same birthday as her second cousin Chloe, who was born in Madrid, Spain. Once again, the women in my family prove their stubborness with Charlotte leading the way being born face up. At a healthy 7 pounds 12 ounces, and 21" long, she is a beautiful little girl who's doiing extremely well.

Any of you who have not witnessed the miracle of child birth, you really have absolutely no idea what you are missing.